stewie vs. the brain

So Im in my Family Guy obsession period...in case you are wondering. The other day I was watching tv and I realized how similar these characters are...haha..Do you guys see any resemblance? In a fight, who do you think would win? The Brain does have Pinky to help him out, but is that an advantage or disadvantage? I think The Brain would just be happy with publically humiliating Stewie, but I think Stewie would be out for blood...
Stewie: a talking baby bent on world domination and matricide, and the Brain: a talking lab mouse who also has the goal to take over the world...
:::::::Stewie:::::::
1)
Stewie: "Damn you, vile woman! You've impeded my work since the day I escaped from your wretched womb."
Blast you and your estrogenical tyranny!
2)
Lois: Oh, I haven't been on a college campus in years. Everything seems so different.
Stewie: Really? Perhaps if you laid on your back with your ankels behind your ears that would ring a few bells.
3)
Meg: Everybody! Guess what I am?
Stewie: Hm, the end result of a drunken back-seat grope-fest and a broken prophylactic?

::::::The Brain::::::
1)
Brain: It proved that radio was a powerful tool.
And now, Pinky, the advance of technology has
brought us an even more powerful tool. Do
you know what that is?
Pinky: Ummm... the rubber band?
Brain: The Workings of you mind are a mystery to me Pinky.
2)
Brain: Promise me something, Pinky. Never breed.
Pinky: I'll try.
3)
Pinky: Gee, Brain, what do you want to do tonight?
Brain: The same thing we do every night, Pinky.
Try to take over the world!

go san diego...

president bush on friday named marine gen. peter pace, from camp pendleton, to be the next chairman of the joint chiefs of staff....and we should be proud...why? not only is san diego one of the most militarily-inclined brainwashed towns in america, but now one of the chief advisors to the idiot represents our town. GOD san diego, i guess when we do something, we go all the way...

stewie...gotta love 'em

Talkin' dogs and talkin' babies...gotta lova that family guy.

Stewie: You know, I rather like this God fellow. Very theatrical, you know. Pestilence here, a plague there. Omnipotence ... gotta get me some of that.
-----------------------------
Brian: Hola, me Ilamo es brian ... Nosotros caramos ir condustedes.. uhhhh ...
Bellboy(spanish): Hey, that was pretty good, except when you said "me llamo es Brian," you don't need the "es," just me llamo Brian.
Brian: Oh, oh you speak english
Bellboy (sigh): No, just that first speech and this one explaining it.
Brian: You .... you're kidding me, right?
Bellboy(spanish): Que?
-----------------------------

have you guys seen this? how gay:)...

My friend sent me this episode of The Simpsons to watch--it's quite funny! I have to say that I think they're kind of running on fumes for many of their little jokes, but overall, it was a nice episode. *Thumbs up* to the residents of Springfield! Even if you were only in it for the money! ;)
Springfield Is for Gay Lovers of Marriage

mikeys itenerary for the weekend

1. friday night - soup exchange
2. friday night - cosmic bowling (drunk)
1. saturday night - bbq dustins(drunk) 4pm till 9-pm
2. saturday night - intermission(shower) 9pm till 9:40pm
3. saturday night - bbq carries(drunk) 9:40 pm till 5:30am (passout there) (wake up 9am)
1. sunday morning - hang over 9am till 12pm (aleave and gatorade)
2. sunday afternoon sleep 12pm till 6pm
3. sunday night - dustins again drink 6pm till 10pm
4. sunday night - lilia's house poker(drunk) 10pm till 2:30am
Summary
Sleep is for the weak. Live hard, Die young, Chicks dig scars

ever wonder?...

How come French fries are not considered vegetables, since they are just deep fried potatoes?
Can you still say "Put it where the sun don't shine " on a nude beach?
Do Jewish vampires avoid crosses or Stars of David?
Why is it that when adults have multiple personalities it's schizophrenia, but when a child has imaginary friends it's cute?
If you swallow a burp does it turn into a fart?
Can you put a gay man in a straight jacket?
Do they have burglar alarms at Christian bookstores?
Why do bullies always ask "what’s your problem" when they're obviously not going to solve it?
Do stairs go up or down?
Isn't Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?

tax brain washing

I am really dense sometimes. I was sitting here watching The Nanny and wondering, "Gee, Lifetime usually shows the episodes in order, why are they showing the episode where Fran gets audited today?" It wasn't until halfway through the Golden Girls episode where Dorothy gets audited that I realized, "Hey, maybe Lifetime's going with a tax day theme." Duh. At least I wasn't surprised when Blanche got audited. I hope that never happens to me.....

"Miss B., what are these deductions for gifts sent to someone named Bubba?"
"I can explain that..."
"And I've never heard of this disability- blogging addiction, what's a blog anyway?"
"Oh, they are really cool, you want to see mine?"
"No. Let's just get on with the audit."
"Yes sir, I am happy for you to audit me." (ask me where that quote REALLY came from sometime).
"Now, I see you work at Bath and Body Works?"
"Yes sir."
"Uh-huh. Yet you apparently have allergies, how can you stand to work there? And isn't it true you ended up in the E.R.? While you were at work?"
"Well, yes, Mr. Auditer, sir..."
"SILENCE! Did I say you could speak?"
"Well, no sir, but as you will notice in line 10.C., I also suffer from an inability to shut up."
"Well, that I believe."
"Thank you sir."
"SILENCE!"
"Now, what's this deduction about?"
"Miss B., I asked you a question."
"ANSWER the question!"
"But you told me to shut up."
"Well, now I'm telling you to talk!"
"Yes sir. You see this deduction is for..."
"Shut it!"
"Yes sir."
"You know what? You annoy me. You're going down."
"But, why?"
"Because I can."
"Nooooo! Somebody rescue me. Somebody. Anybody?"
Collective laughter.
"Don't leave me here like this! Guys? Help me! Guys?"
Silence.

the pope

Yesterday I was hanging out with Mikey eating at Souplantation...yeah 'cause Im on a diet to impress Olga- A Russian red party lover who hates the fall of the wall and runs the night audit at the hotel. As I was eating my salad Mikey says to me: "I just realized that right now I'm off the hook for everything morally until there's a new Pope."...then he said "I think I should throw a Pope-n-Hoe party." I mean....what the fuck Mikey?..that fool just fucks with my brain man...

Gotta love NorCal weather. 

Roscoes Chicken and Waffles. Yes ma'am. It's worth a drive up to L.A. at 11pm!! 

entry numero uno

Hey... I suppose I have to write in this thing quite often. .

The other day at work we got a ridiculous memo from our front office manager. As some of you know, I work at the Best Western 7 Seas in Hotel Circle. The Memo blabbed some nonsense about the driver's commission, referring all tour inquiries to them, and not booking tours. As part of the front desk it is inevitable to have guests ask and want to book tours or rent cars through us. We sell boarding passes for Trolley Tours, Harbor Tours, and arrange for tours of San Diego, Rosarito, and Ensenada. If the driver isn’t there, as the memo mentions, we are to tell the guest to come back when the driver happens to be there, and send them off.

Now, I find it quite ridiculous on a Sat morning, when a guest wants to take the first tour Trolley Tour and get started with the day, that we have to tell them to come back in a couple of hours when the driver is back from doing runs. “Sorry ma’am, I am not allowed to book the tour for you,” thinking: “and i am sure as hell not working to get the driver free commission I wont see a penny of” But I thought it was about the guests’ convenience, not the driver getting commission? With the car rentals, don’t even get me started. I have worked for a guest on getting them a car and when my commission has been dropped off, the driver pockets the money. Why should the driver get commission for work he didn’t do? I just find so much bull in this that it makes me sick. Sure the front desk gets $1 commission on ticket sales, so what? Drivers gets tips from the people they drive. Commission for the work you do. What the hell is so hard to understand about that?